Tuesday 17th October 2006

The weekend is creeping up on me. I think I am ready one moment and then I burst into tears the next !! I read on someones journal on the WLS info forum that 3 people from the forum died last year, but apparently it was not the WLS that finished them off. All the same it gave me the eebie jeebies. That said, I know the risks are really low. I have more risk of death every time I get in my car and drive somewhere than I will having this op. It kind of puts it back in perspective.

I have packed a load of things in my case already, and this morning I went and had a wander round the shops, and made myself look at the size 20 stuff which I hope I can fit into by Christmas. I was pleasantly surprised that there was a good selection which looked nice, and this made me feel better. I got a few bits and bobs for the kids too, as a little treat for while I am away. Mainly for Aidan and Rachel because there is a loft full of things that Michael has not seen or played with yet that will be like a treat for him.

I busied myself the rest of the morning making Aidan's birthday cake for him to take to school tomorrow. I am still disgusted at the parents who did not bring their kids to his party. I hope they take a bite of his cake and choke on it. They were rude and uncaring to not bother even sending the RSVP back for his party.

I have been feeling sick for about a week now. I know it's the nerves working on me. What am I doing????? I hope this calms down before the weekend. I need it to. Maybe it won't calm down til I am on the plane when I can get into the mode of 'going about the business of getting this op done'. I keep wanting to burst into tears though... this is mad.